All day today, I was fretting about where and when I would find a stranger to talk to. Initially, I was thinking maybe I could ask the UPS dude who comes into our office all the time but who I never really talk to (though once I chased him down the street and he played a trick on me) or the cleaning dude I always say hi to but whose name I don't even know. But the UPS guy (whose name, I later found out, is Moe and now he's technically not a stranger anymore) was in and out today right quick without stopping to chat, and I didn't even see the cleaning dude. First fail of the day.
Then I thought I would ask the guy who works in the garage where my friend Rich parks his car, or maybe Rich's doorman Nelson, but again, technically not strangers either. *sigh* So I went to McDonald's with Brandon and had to put my needing to talk to a stranger aside as Brandon did NOT want to be a part of my weirdness. hahahha He DID suggest ways to approach people though. Some of his suggestions include:
1) Using a pick up line to break the ice. "If your left leg was Thanksgiving and your right leg was Christmas, can I meet you between the holidays? Hi, my name is Joyce, can I take your picture?" (I revised it to, "If your left leg was Martin Luther King Day and your right leg was President's Day..." which we found amusing.)
2) Throwing ketchup packets to get a person's attention and then asking to take a picture.
3) Just being really really weird.
After McDonald's, I thought for sure I could find someone at the train station, but I kept getting more and more nervous about approaching anyone. The hard part, I realize, is that it is tough to pick someone you think will talk to you and not be creepy. And to find someone who didn't look creepy themselves. And to find someone ALONE because it's weird to go to three people and just pick one person and be like, "hi, of your friends, I want to talk to YOU." Anyway, I didn't find anyone at the station I thought I could approach, and no one on the train either. *Note to self: I really should wear make up on Stranger Day so that maybe I look less weird, or at least, it will be harder to say no to a prettier girl or something.*
So I'm on my block thinking I will find someone on my way home, and if all else fails, maybe I can ask the guy who works at the shady deli. But no such luck! Everyone on my way home was in twos or threes or on their phone or listening to music, and at the shady deli, there were THREE guys! I bought a bottle of water for nothing! Gahhhhh
I am a determined person, so I refused to go home until I found someone... but it was exasperating walking around my block three or four times, panicking with each round because I couldn't find anyone I felt I could approach! The guys who work in the barber shop down the street probably thought I was insane because I passed by so many times; there was a lady in her car doing her make up that I considered asking, but thought that would be too creepy; I was too slow for this one man running down the street; and all the old people walking alone were Asian and I worried they didn't speak any English... My block was so bad for me trying to meet people! On the bright side, it's great for if you're on a diet as it's kind of like forced exercise.
Everyone looked so much like they didn't want to be bothered and I've found I have this irrational fear of being rejected. Not irrational as in, I couldn't possibly be rejected, but irrational because there really is nothing to be afraid of. This is a lesson I learned today. I learn this lesson a lot, but apparently, I also forget this lesson a lot.
Enter Barry.
Barry works at the Educational Alliance Center near me, and I spied him alone at the front desk after my fourth round of walking around the neighborhood. He seemed like a nice guy who would probably help me out of my dilemma of not being able to go home because I hadn't accomplished my goal to talk to someone new today...and I was right (which was a good thing because it was cold outside and I had been needing the bathroom for quite a while)! He's an avid reader (The Last Battle of Icemark, which is the third book in the Icemark Chronicles, is pictured here) and he seems to have a great outlook on life from our conversation. In our short conversation, he taught me a few good life lessons, I hope I can remember them all:
1) It's never a bad thing to want to talk to new people and it's not weird at all since there are so many people out here in NYC. It's tough, but it's good to push yourself to try new things.
2) Having goals is great because they push you to grow as a person, but try to leave a little room for yourself to be flexible with them and try not to be too rigid about it.
3) No matter how busy you are, you should take the time to do something for yourself.
4) You can learn the most interesting things about people just by listening.
5) Don't be too hard on yourself.
I think I may be passing by the Educational Alliance Center from time to time (in between the hours of 3-10) to say hi to my new friend. Meeting new people is harder than I thought, but the payoff can be pretty freaking sweet.
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