Day 3: Self-reflection

Instead of merely trying to unpack, I've decided to make life much more difficult for myself and have slowly been working on my room. It's a crazy process, because before I can put any new clothes away, I have to clear out my closet and make room for it. I never switched out from my summer wardrobe, and now that I've lost some of my sentimentality (at least in the practical sense, as most of it is still in tact), I've been throwing stuff out and putting things in bags to give away... I'm a little excited. First I'm going to work on my closet and slowly work my way out. It will look like a disaster zone for a long while, but it will get better eventually...

Anyway, I had trouble with my closet doors, so I pulled them out and laid them across my room and thought it was time to revisit the idea of reflections...





I spend a lot of time with reflections... And I don't just mean my appearance, but you know, reflecting about life in general; the past and how I miss it; the present and how I try to live for it but sometimes slog through it; and the future and how it scares and excites me....

After I snapped this shot and reviewed it (first to make sure I didn't look too disgusting, I'm soooo vain sometimes! lol), it made me think about how for all the time I've spent with myself, there is still so much to discover... I wonder if anyone ever really sees in their reflection what other people see...and I mean this both literally and figuratively...Literally in the sense that sometimes, we are never fully aware of our own physical beauties or imperfections (depending on self-esteem, I suppose), and figuratively in that we never fully understand what people may admire or loathe about ourselves....

...It's not like I don't know who I am or what makes the core parts of me, but more like... there's so many things people see in me that sometimes I fail to see in myself. I've slowly been getting better at that, and goodness knows that I am quite self-aware, but I still have a long way to go...
but aside from who I am inside (now I've got that "Reflection" song stuck in my head; and what's worse, it alternated between the movie version and the Christina Aguilera version... lol...Who is that girl I seeeeeee, staring straight, back at me? When will my reflection show, who I am insiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiide?.... haha), I wonder if someday, far off into the future, I will wake up and not realize the old lady staring me in the face is myself...

...some very randomly interesting thoughts for a very jetlagged girl...